Responsibility is Freedom

What women seem to be looking for in a mature masculine man is responsibility. One who knows how a home works; whether or not he can fix it or have someone else rebuild it as needed. One who knows how to keep it clean; as an orderly functional machine, inside and out of the home. He takes pride in his environment with or without a woman. So if one comes along, that relationship becomes a co-created one. Which means he’s NOT relied on her to know how the laundry works, or how to load or unload the dishwasher to be a functional part of the household machine. While she has the confidence to stack firewood too. The modern relationship is one of shared responsibilities, and that means this co-created relationship doesn’t have defining edges. He doesn’t JUST go to work and make money, and she doesn’t JUST raise the kids, cook meals, and clean house. These responsibilities cross lines, creating freedom for either one to have a career that makes the money, or both to have the excitement of raising the kids, because it’s a shared responsibility. Responsibility is Freedom across the board. And because of all this, this experience has far less ego in it, and a LOT more love. See a need, fill a need. And when a partner steps away from responsibility and into entitlement, then it’s easy to let them go. Because responsibility IS freedom; the less responsibility the less freedom. There’s no judgement, and there’s no ego. It’s just how the machine works.

The 20’s should be a time for self-discovery.
As long as you’re feeling the invincibility of youth, then the maturity of marriage is not for you.
Marriage should come in the mid 30’s when a person matures into adulthood; there is a noticeable shift we go through, where we settle into life. This is where the idea of marriage has Root, very different from “something to do” or “it’s that Time of life”. Where marriage has merit in “for better or for worst”. This shift into maturity tells you well beyond a shadow of doubt, that the person you’ll marry will carry you through… Or not.

Then the idea of The Pod; a group of like-minded people living together, working toward the common goal of unified/wholesome living. Where everyone has that sense of responsibility, and the only difference is: each person brings their gift/talent to this table’s feast, which gives the group a unique spin. Where married couples can be mixed into this group.
It takes a village of people that are acting from their highest potential/higher self, to collectively produce a course of action that heals instead of wounding; constructive criticism instead of destructive criticism. Raising each others kids, for a truly empowering jumping off point onto the world’s stage. Bringing together a beacon of light, breaking the old forms of tradition, and stepping bravely for others as a demonstration, or the practice of our inner Light’s greatest springboard into new possibilities.
The Pod has no head. However, something like a spiritual practice or quality of life statement becomes the “model”; a format that gives the group shape and direction. So it’s not a single person making a decision… Leading to judgement, guilt, and all that egotistical crap. There’s a model/map to follow.

Still, responsibility and freedom are married; as in one thing. And when there’s lack of responsibility in a relationship there are gaps, and the machine starts to wobble. This is where resentment comes from, and the break down of trust, and the family unit.
So the sooner we learn that responsibility is freedom, the less turmoil we have to endure, and the easier we find the path to empowerment/New Earth.

My love and blessings to you.

NOTE:
Divorce should not side for the women or the man. It should side 100% for the child; a soul contract for 18 years. This means that you don’t have to sleep in the same bed, however you must be under the same roof for the wellbeing of that child. A court of law should send that couple to therapy instead of divorce, for the remainder of the 18 years. This is the consequences of having children.

The Dawn of New Beginnings…

It’s been in my field for a long time, matter of fact nearly every Post on this site is in preparation for this global awakening, and spiritual ascension. Breaking down old systems that no longer serve, and setting straight miscommunications. This closer connection, and relationship to our spiritual wisdom, is insuring a higher consciousness for higher living in this dawn of new beginnings.
I came across this video that describes the current awareness (end of 2023), for the up coming 5D event. In which he describes a direction very clearly. Enjoy.

Well that didn’t take long; deleting the video.
To some up what it was about: It’s time to take our attention off of the outside world, and turn our attention to ourselves. Even to the point of it looking as if we are selfish. The 5D shift is upon us, and if we are “helping” someone over there we will not be prepared for the change that only happens one in a trillion! Do you want to be the one who slept through the greatest shift in the history of this solar system?!
So, find your happy place, laugh a lot; raise your vibration, rise to greet this occasion.
It takes a world of people to move as one to open this door, yet, when crossing that threshold only one can cross at a time, and we can’t carry anyone/thing not even our baggage. Now is the time, rise up to ONLY focus on the self.
See you on the other side!

Lightening That Splits The Sky

The Deep Dark Cabal and the CIA along with the NSA have been programing humanity for the last seventy years, into the submission of chaos. In the last 10 years they have been slowly removing the importance of the elderly from the nuclear family.
What elderly have brought to this table of life is a strong sense of moral grounding. A great source for navigating this wisdom as needed, as well as an amazing historical resource to name a few.
Without this moral grounding we start to loose the connection with empathy; the sacred masculine the sacred feminine, and connection to God, and instead introduces chaos or “that” which opposes God. Because when we are in a state of chaos, we are then easy to control by the Cabal. Yet when we follow God, the Cabal becomes just another obstacle in the room that’s far easier to avoid.
A healthy sacred masculine or sacred feminine is what produces the Divine relationship; that which moves like silk. When this fire is lit in us, this sacred masculine consciousness has this natural response to women that wants to feed emotional reassurance, and emotional availability to her creativity. Her healthy sacred feminine wants to nurture and protect him with an open door of communication. And for most this is an unconscious action. Now when we remove this we then have a person with NO empathy; no conscious accountability. And not something anyone wants to mate with, like cuddling up to a porcupine.
The men stepping away from dating, have good reason because of the legal system siding with women. However, the men have NO emotional accountability; they are just as wounded and destructive as the women are! This doesn’t solve anything, they must go a step further, and heal that amazing heart then transform all that anger. So what-ever is said, is no longer triggered. When a man is wounded, he steps away from the purity of his Spirit, and reverts to his chaotic Ego who Only wants to be King of the Hill. If we want a productive loving relationship, we cannot do it from a place of survival, and the ego is always wounded. So, we must heal. The strength of a wounded man is shown as loud power and zero tolerance. For me, my gentle strength has volumes of tolerance, and from this ability she finds me VERY safe, which is a complete turn-on for her.
The wounded woman will go to amazing extremes. One being the moment she puts a dollar value on her beauty, from that moment forward all her experiences are saturated with chaos, the opposite of blissful empowerment. Her heart connections; those amazing God-gifts that men find SO valuable about women has taken a backseat, and out of her line of sight. It’s time to heal, and with something as simple as the gentle art of boundaries.

The term “simping” is an act that comes from single parent families. Without a man Mom can’t teach sacred masculine to her sons, and without a woman Dad can’t teach sacred feminine to his daughters. “A healed man through his sacred masculine fire knows his value, and is not afraid to step into a ready-made family, and teach with the strength of his heart the greatest of possibilities”… Like lightening that splits the sky!!!

The angry feminist and modern women have been programing, and indoctrinating those who are not able to heal past their anger, and instead into entitlement. Where the women want a 6 foot plus man who makes at least 6 figures, which triggers the men to respond in wanting only women who are submissive and a virgin. And the way we can tell that this is programing, is that ALL the men effected by this want the same thing, and ALL the women want the same thing that can only be fulfilled by one percent of one percent of the population. If this where natural, the variation would be a large spectrum response, instead of this very narrow band. It’s time to wake up from the matrix, and choose not to be governed by this programing. See it for what it is, don’t fall for these pretty words, and dare to be different.
As I look at this I see less than 10 percent of the nation’s population from ages 0 to 33 that are effected by this programing, and for the healing of this group of young people, their life-lessons coming at them are huge; massively HUGE. As a spiritual healer and teacher, there’s nothing in me that wants to approach them. It’s like approaching a betrayed caged 40 foot dragon… Nope, nada! They’ve got to want it badly enough to ask for it by name from those of us who are healed. And then, we are here.

My blessings to you…

Respect

All of our freedoms in life come from responsibility; the more freedom we get the more responsibility comes with it. Respect is a byproduct of the action of responsibility. Respect is what the world sees, and what draws other responsible people to you; other people with more freedoms to offer.
Respect also shows maturity, which gives us a clear avenue of how much we want to participate with them.
In the practice of boundaries, we get to look at all these little pieces as we assemble our puzzle of who and how or what is our inner circle, and why it’s so important to be active, and in charge of that circle.
Remember, a healthy relationship is fluid, and in the constant movement of change. The honor of being in someone’s inner circle is shown by physical respect, emotional respect… “That” which builds trust in all its forms.

Blessings…

What’s In The Mix?

When we want to understand the finer details of karmic connections:

When we are looking at a potential partner, and asking ourselves about all those little things as in “do we match”. What is it that we want to see and or feel? We often want that “click”… We want something gentle, and somewhat easy.
Truth is we can have all that, we have to decide that we are worthy of asking for what we want, and not just taking what we’re given. Return it if it’s not exactly what you want! With relationships we have to have eyes wide open as we go through a check list of needs, or we’ll find karma and or nature filling in those gaps where we’re not paying attention; when we ask for 3 things in someone, and leave out a lot of details. Those details may be filled in by Spirit/God as a way to fulfill your karmic path.

Our karmic life path for each person has a very specific flavor; very specific issues that we’re working through… Knowing what your karmic issues are is acknowledging where your emotional challenging places are. All those places where we run from issues that life demands of us, those are our karmic life issues.
When we get together with another person, we are mixing those two flavors, yours and theirs. And not just with relationships… Business deals, friendships… Anytime we are in action with another person this combination will show itself.

The person in the relationship with the most intense karma will also have the strongest influence in any given situation. So if you’re in a business deal, and the person with the gentlest flavor happens to be the one doing the talking, then the karmic expression of that deal will have the influence for the outcome. This is “what’s best for the team” comes into play, and from this what kind of outcome is desired. However, if the two of you are doing something like buying a house together, the outcome of that purchase will come from that combination unless one works the deal.
So if you’re someone who’s looking at the details of karmic connections and desired outcomes, paying close attention to what’s in the mix of those amazing personalities people carry… Will be time well spent.

Blessings…

Lost and Found

When a woman is looking for a new partner, what she is looking for is “a man that will fulfill every need, and heal every wound”. And to her she “believes” he should already instinctively know that he is here to provide this.

This creates huge discord in relationships! Because 1) whether she likes it or not this is completely off his radar, and 2) she is being completely irresponsible with her hurt emotional needs… Conscious or unconscious. Men and women are SO incredibly different from each other, that when we come together that joining needs to be so very gentle.
This is something all women do that can be very subconscious. Younger women do this, however by the time they reach their 3rd part of their lives they’ve started to move away from this.
Men need to learn this about women, because this is 90 percent of the reason why at the end of relationships she is so mad that she is taking most of what he owns, and is shredding his character for all to see. All because she will never speak out loud of this. Women are incredibly secretive, even to themselves.

(I know I’m repeating myself) A healthy balanced relationship is one in which she or he is responsible by following their own happiness, and the other person is along for the fun. A hurtful wound can ONLY be healed by the person in pain. Through communication the other partner can facilitate the emotional support. However they can not ever DO it for you, you will have to cross that threshold for yourself.
This practice of being the master of your own direction will also give her more vital energy, and focused attention longer into her life, because her precious energy won’t be spent on so much dread, and “here we go again” failed expectations.

Men need to read this, then process this, then reread and process deeper. Men need to know why there is such a thing as a “dog house”. For it should be seen as a blazing red flag that something is amiss; some discord in the relationship that needs immediate attention FOR BOTH PARTNERS TO LOOK AT!
Digging into lost and found, and adopting this lifestyle with this practice of always being the one in control of one’s own happiness (regardless of relationship status). This will in itself heal, and naturally take care of it. Because for me my pursuit of happiness is always my first thought, and it is this action that produces the consistent empowerment in all my relationships, more so than anything else that I can think of… Well maybe more with my practice with God.
This practice is best learned from our parents, something that has been taught as a demonstration, and therefor become natural, and is continued as we step out onto the world stage.

Blessings…

Continue this read with Ego-less Relationship
and or Boundaries and Personal Power
as well as other links from those Posts.

Being in Tune with Your Partner

Everyone has something that they put themselves into, a passion, a hobby, a career… Being in-tune with our partner is knowing what they need to thrive, and supporting them in making that happen. This makes you the most wanted person on the planet. However this has to be equal on both sides; if (she) is supporting his career then he needs to-at the same time support something for her that has her feeling equally inspired. When there is equal support being expressed, there is a lot less resentment. This practice is consistently on going, and like good wine it gets better with time. This pours into all forms of life; personal, sex, family, home, friends, financial, spiritual practice…
She loves to tend plants, so I build flowerbeds. She processes some of her life through color. So she picks out the color, and I paint the room. And when she crashes emotionally, she knows the consistency of my gentle strength is there for her support. Being in tune with your partner is knowing when you need to completely stop what you’re doing, and give them your undivided attention. Helping her to process by supporting her to be the best she can be, in her language, and at her speed. He knows she knows what she needs, he doesn’t have to guess. It helps him that she is able to ask directly for what it is that she needs, and not have that need hidden obscurely in some unrelated conversation. “She has his attention while asking for that need, so he can hear it well enough to repeat it”. By repeating it out loud he will remember it better, and because of this she feels fully supported of him.
What women need most is for men to be present; giving her his intimate attention, and not because he wants sex. Because he also wants “that” from her.
Give and take needs to be balanced in relationships; if I give emotional support what I get back may not be the same, it will however be something of equal importance to me. This is balance.
For her: he will slow down, step out of his comfort zone, and actually listen to who she is and how she is. The feminine loves to process out her issues by talking it through out loud, and face to face. So by listening well enough, he can begin to understand the difference between when it is that she needs him to fix a problem, and when to just listen and be present. Being present is giving her your full undivided attention without trying to “fix” anything; it’s non-active yet she has your full attention for her “safety, and emotional needs”, even if it’s just to listen. So this means turning off the TV, turning off anything that may distract you from whatever her needs are, turn and face her. And sometimes that means keeping the conversation going: by saying something like, “how did that make you feel”. So she can unload all, and process through her emotional entanglement completely.
For him: she will step outside of her comfort zone, and to reassure and guide him through his own emotional mine-field. The masculine tends to be private, and off by himself with his emotions. So by listening to “why” it is that he needs his “respectful silence”, she can better support his need for emotional clarity.
Men tend to be loud, even though he seeks quiet and solitude, he uses non-verbal communication. Women are very quiet, even though she seeks company and likes to chatter, she tends to keep things secretively to herself, and even from herself.
Women need safety.
Men need respect.
For a meaningful and enriched relationship they will both want to learn to step outside of their comfort zones, then use their face to face words in gently describing what they need. It’s the quality of relating that needs practice. It’s daring to express with clarity and depth.
Intimately knowing her love language, the culture she’s accustom with, the family dynamics she grew up in, what her personal growth curve is, her spiritual goals, and out of all that, also learning what “she values from me” different from what “I think she needs”. Then being supportive in that field.
The instincts of women is that they are information gathers, and supreme nurtures, and that’s what makes them so valuable to men. The same would be said for men: beyond his protection he also provides the space and vehicle for her creativity. The more he knows about her, and is consistently attentive to her needs, the more valuable he becomes as a mate to her. This goes both ways: as he is for her, she is for him.

It’s equally important to study their shadow side, to be clear that it’s something you can live with. Knowing how they deal with anger, and more importantly how they deal with you “while angry”? What are their trigger points, and how angry is angry? Do they blame, or do they take responsibility for their own direction?

My blessings to you…

Notes:
Be mindful of your own sense of personal boundaries. Give as much as you’re willing to give, or the resentment will shred what you’re trying to build. Follow the happiness of what you’re providing. Pace yourself, we’re not building Rome in a day. A little goes a long ways. However be very mindful of the Plans and Promises that are spoken of.
Remember: this needs to be consistent all the way through your relationship. The quality of what you did to win (her) heart in the beginning of your relationship, needs to be consistent all the way through to the end. When she says “I do”, it keeps going. When you stop, the relationship and her trust begins to unravel. Women need this support all the way through their lives for a healthy relationship, just like how the masculine needs physical and emotional attention all the way through his life.
Cheating mostly comes from not being consistent all the way through. Somehow there’s a belief that once they say “I do” the work is over. So if it’s “work” to you, it would be wise to think very carefully before saying “I do”. Because as she is walking out the door with everything you own, that’s the consequence of being inconsistent. So know yourself, and know them.
Know their love-language, because if he speaks a different language than what she needs to experience, she won’t get her needs met. And the same would be said for him.
The love-language that your partner needs, needs to be something that’s easy for you to give. This is part of “do we match”? And if not, then it’s necessary to find a balanced way of receiving that need through another avenue. This is always done through communication with your partner, so they are in on the discussion, and part of the decision.
The love-languages are:
words of affirmation, (spoken affection)
physical touch, (affectionate / nurturing / healing touch, cuddling)
acts of service,
quality time,
and gifts.
And so much more on Relationships.

* When choosing to open the door to a new relationship, it helps greatly to be mindful of the first intention set for that union. He wants a sex partner, she wants a traveling partner, he’s looking forward to the spiritual clarity, she wants to start a family, and so on. It’s that initial thought behind the reason for starting a new relationship that gives such power to it’s influence.
If you are in an established relationship, and you want to change it’s flavor and direction. To do so the both of you will need to sit together, and come up with a “mission statement” or “quality of life statement” that better matches this next phase of your (hers and his) life.

* Part of what makes each relationship different has a lot to do with the mixing of his and her karmic life lessons.
If she has challenges declaring healthy boundaries, and he has issues with the navigations of his finances. That combined dynamic may feel heavier if you let those issues push you around. So it could be wise for her to navigate the finances, and for him to navigate (guard) testy outside influences regarding the home. Then your combined karmic life will move with greater ease.
Can a Karmic Relationship Work?

2023, karma is starting to come to an end. By the end of 2024 karma will be no more. As we move away from the 3rd density reality, and on into the 5th vibrational frequency where Karma and the Akashic cannot exist.
 
To continue this conversation, just contact me at chrissnell06@yahoo.com

Plans and Promises

Something all men need to remember: women hear everything you plan to do and file it away in their minds. So as the relationship continues, they are looking for you to fulfill that promise. Even though to you it doesn’t seem to be a promise, and when it’s not fulfilled she begins to loose faith in you as a provider. This is an automatic emotional response, as part of her instinctual behavior, and part of how women process information in relationships. And NOT something she can change, because it’s instinctual.
Part of how a man pulls in a woman on a date, is by sharing his ideas and plans for their union. Everything that is spoken out loud with her, needs to be produced. This includes all ideas of doing things, going places or owning things. A man who is a good provider will always perform the plans he speaks of, and this in turn will build a closer connection with her.
When a man shares plans and promises without truly having the intention of actually doing it, he will find himself in the bewilderment of his woman’s wrath, and not understanding where all this resentment came from!? “Well buddy, this is it”.
It is exceptionally important for a man to do what he says he will, or ONLY keep those ideas in his thoughts. This needs to be an active practice for most men, or get used to the idea of living in the doghouse.
However to those in which this action comes naturally, you can skip over this exam, for you have already passed this class.

Blessings…

The Changing Winds

For a problem to be solved, the solution must be of a higher vibrational frequency, then that of which created it in the first place. This is why it doesn’t quite feel as though it’s changed, it just feels as if it’s repeating itself. Quiet your spirit, quiet your thoughts, quiet your emotions until you come to mental and emotional clarity. Where life begins to come back into alignment with love and abundance. We are loosing our patience with our fellow humans, simply because we don’t have a practice of being quiet.
There was a time not so long ago, where we lived and reacted to the movement of Spirit. Listening to the rhythms of the shift in seasons, or watching the animals to see what’s going on in the neighborhood. Our attention to our environment was very different then, then now. Today we have a lot of gadgets and technology that distract us from what is real. A gathering of friends, face to face interactions with people, or acts of exceptional kindness.
Solving a problem can no longer always be fire with fire, that is old-school thinking. Nothing alters a persons fortunes more, then being in a higher awareness. From this expanded view we can see beyond the reactionary emotion, and engage with the wisdom of the Sages. Because when we react without thinking, those around us who are in balance, will only see the fool in us, and this can burn bridges and break down lines of trust. To be taken seriously requires us to put the emotions on the shelf, and calmly bring resolutions to the table.
Being reactionary and fighting fire with fire makes more fire, with it’s loud and angry voices. However, it’s the calm, and collective mind with the answers to resolve that gets the attention. A judge in a court room doesn’t want to listen to you when you’re being angry, he will however pay more attention to a calm voice with a resolution.

(I’m not a fan of political opinions) If we want change in our country (USA), protesting in outrage against corporations that are bigger than our government itself will not change a thing, like a flea to an elephant. Instead be the change you want to see. We often forget that “we the people” are the machine that makes the corporations big. Educate yourself on the world around you; everything from what is sprayed into the air that we breathe, what is smeared on the skin, the food that is eaten… Support or start businesses that produce healthy products, transform your home’s energy needs, use transportation that supports your own best ideas. Every time we let go of the emotional ego, then create something from a higher awareness, that something becomes very successful simply because it has the “perfection of God” in it.  God in action from you arrives when we put our dollar in a company that supports our values… Or remove our dollar from a company that does not support our values. When this rings true in you, then this is God In Action coming through you.

Blessings…

In Marriage, What Are We Looking For?

What draws us together and has us fall in love with a person? In observing my fellow bloggers, I see the attraction being very sexual. Then I watch them trying to carve out a practical, functioning relationship that is based on hot, steamy sexuality. What makes a relationship work is temperament in personality, and something that is nearly ignored because the sex is so great. Sex is the bonus and should be the last thing on the list when looking for a quality life-mate, however not ignored. More importantly what we need to experience with our mate, before we say “I do”, is their disagreeable side. Everyone has one, and it’s so important to have a strong grasp on whether or not that is something you can handle for a lifetime.
What we’re looking for is a responsible, mature person of integrity. Someone with good healthy boundaries, is able to think on their feet, and solve issues with intelligent communication skills.
* Is she the nurturing healer, and is he the compassionate leader?
* How they deal with anger, and more importantly, how they “deal with you” while angry.
* With the conflict: are they responsible with their own emotional reactions by practicing boundaries, or do they insist that it’s all your fault for their unhappiness?
* In the area of sex, some people have a very crude understanding of the sensitivities that need to be shared in sexuality, and it may be wise to know what sensitivities you need in your experiences to thrive.
* Marriage in the 18 and 1900’s made complete sense, simply because things moved at a slower pace, and it took us a lifetime to process through our emotional issues with our partner. Today, things move so much faster, we process through our emotional issues so much more quickly. Staying in a marriage requires us to have “eyes wide open“, to build our communicative skills, and to learn as much or more about ourselves than we do about our partner. These are a few of the responses you want to experience before marriage.
* Relationships have a modal that they follow: first is the lustful romance; pure chemistry, hot and steamy yet extremely fragile, and designed to pull you both together. Then that shifts into partnership, where 78% of the chemistry fades, and honest love shines it’s radiance. And for some, in our latter years companionship shows it’s true colors. Then there is spiritual love, which about one percent of the worlds population will experience. This is about a love for someone’s spiritual growth; it’s about the journey, and not about the destination; it’s about the path of the spirit, way beyond blood and bone.
An amazing amount of people get married before the relationship has a chance to shift into partnership [up to 9 months], because when it does the intensity really changes; really softens those edges. If you’re someone who loves change, then this will be fun for you. However, if you’re someone who always needs fireworks, then you maybe better going form branch to branch (keep it to dating).
Very few people have the Will of heart to see beyond love, beyond sex, to see if and where a relationship is sturdy. If it’s not working, then simply bless them and let them go, and continue the search for the right one. Asking the right questions, patiently waiting for the response, and having the courage to only say “yes” to the one that passes the grade.

Marriage: is a best friend you want to be with All the time.
Through the dating process you both have supported each other in becoming the best of yourselves. Marriage is a milestone for a celebrated ritual, that explains how the two of you are going to continue to support each other, through the growth of the healing that encourages the enrichment of both your individual, and combined inner potentials.
She is looking for him to provide safety through authenticity. He is looking for her to be respectful through authenticity.

Every single relation/connection with people has an alignment: if your angry with the world, your alignment with this person is one in which they will mirror to you what needs to be healed. If you fall in love with someone in which “you feel” is not quite right and you do it anyway, the connection will show you why it’s so important to give attention to your intuition/gut feeling/inner voice. Alignment made manifest, and so it is.
A healthy and meaningful marriage today requires eyes wide open. This is not just a concept in one’s mind, this is seeing them act it out. If (he) does not shift his awareness, and curb his actions to match your needs, then it may not be in him to do so. Having eyes wide open means less will take you by surprise.

May your search be swift and true.
Blessings…

Related posts: Relationships, Plans and Promises, Light Bulb, Passions of the Heart, Sexual Energy and Spiritual Energy, Table of Contents, Ego-less Relationship…