The term “I love you” is used nearly everywhere, and not always in a nice way. She says it, so he feels obligated to say it back, and if he doesn’t say it she feels rejected. Or when he says “you know I love you”, and the words and the look in his eyes tell two different stories. The phrase “I love you” can create both positive and indifferent qualities, depending upon the emotion behind it. When we use the term loosely it begins to lose it’s luster.
Part of knowing how to provide a nurturing relationship is knowing when it’s the perfect time to say “I love you”. The best time is when the other person is doing, or saying something that nurtures and supports the gift that you are. When our actions are in alignment with our words, we come face to face with purpose. “And like a light kindled from a leaping spark, finds it’s way into the heart, and the world starts making sense”. This becomes god in action in you, because this gives the relationship / marriage shape.

* While he is taking out the garbage, shoveling the driveway, hauling firewood, fixing that squeaky door,  she says “I love you”, because she values that “can do” energy about him.
Or when he stops what he is doing, and gives her his undivided attention. Or he helps her to process through an emotional issue, without he himself engaging in emotion…
We only need to say it when we feel valued in that moment. By saying it every time, it loses that sparkle.
* While she is cooking an amazing meal, when he returns to a warm inviting home, knows his needs before he does, has the clarity and understanding to help him to navigate his emotional world…
This is apart of the action of sacred sex; giving purpose which sculptures the landscape of the wisdom that is performed.

Saying “I love you” can be a very powerful thing, especially when it’s said from the response of the action that produced it. You’re no longer just wondering through life, and trying to guess what your partner’s needs are. They are giving you direct feedback, and a great sense of what it is that they love about you. This in turn gives you direction and purpose. Providing grace and ease in an otherwise unpredictable environment.

My blessings to you…

Notes:
* Sometimes explaining what an “I love you” means can be helpful as well, because what it means to you, and how they may be perceiving it maybe two very different things. Especially in the beginning of relationships where you’re getting to know each other.

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